What is an Elopement? | How To Elope
What is an elopement?
So, you’ve heard of eloping…but what is an elopement? How do you have one? What does the process entail?
Well, you’ve landed in the right place! Consider this blog post your ultimate guide – a roadmap to everything you need to know about the act of eloping. Once synonymous with courthouse vows, secrecy, and skipping town in a whirlwind of spontaneity, elopements have entered into a new era – one where they are recognized as some of the most intentional, inspiring, and authentic ways to get married. In the sections ahead, you’ll find everything from what elopements truly mean, to common myths, planning tips, legal considerations, and so much more to help you feel confident in building a celebration that’s wholly your own.
Hi there, I’m Ciana – A Documentary Destination Wedding & Elopement Photographer
Whether you’re brand new to this space or already deep in the planning process, I want to welcome you with open arms – and an invitation to dream big. Maybe you’re at the very beginning of this journey, unsure of what kind of celebration you want, or maybe you’re just wrapped up somewhere in between – I’ve created a network of resources to guide you with clarity, confidence, and a little magic as you design a wedding day that’s entirely your own.
The definition of eloping
Although the definition of eloping has drastically evolved throughout the years, it hasn’t been until fairly recently that people have begun to explore the modern day meaning of elopements and intimate weddings.
Eloping, at its core, means choosing a deeply personal, intimate, and distinctly intentional way to get married. Elopements are wedding celebrations that are not bound by societal traditions, but by the unique values, wants, and desires expressed by the individuals that intend to elope.
Elopements create space for couples to break free from the “one-size-fits-all” narrative we’ve been conditioned to accept as the only way to get married. It challenges the outdated ideas and preconceived notions couples often carry with them as they set out on their wedding planning journey. Eloping allows you to create a day that genuinely reflects who you are – it’s not about what you’re skipping, but what you’re choosing instead.
The Evolution of Elopements
Contrary to the once popular belief that elopements had to be these impromptu and elusive affairs, they are now characterized by the freedom to focus solely on your connection. In fact, if you still look up the official definition of eloping on Google, you’ll find this:
“To run away secretly in order to get married, especially without parental consent.”
While this may be the written definition provided by the Merriam-Webster Dictionary or Oxford Languages, it couldn’t be farther from the truth.
Gone are the days when eloping meant secretly slipping away to Las Vegas to hide a decision that needed justification – whether it was a whirlwind romance, family tension, or something else entirely. The modern elopement is rich with creativity, emotion, and sentiment. As couples reevaluate what really matters to them, the world has seen a beautiful shift: from weddings rooted in misaligned tradition and performance to celebrations that reciprocate a couple’s lifestyle, story, and values.
Elopements today often include:
Eloping has transformed into a form of empowerment, a way to reclaim how marriage is celebrated.
Types of Elopements
Because there is no one conforming, (or inflexible), definition of an elopement, there’s room for individual interpretation, (which is incredibly cool on a universal scale if you ask me). Some couples chase after an epic mountain top ceremony at sunrise, while others want a laid-back evening with five friends on the beach. With such a wide and diverse range of celebrations out there, it can be a challenge to identify what kind of elopements suit you and your partner – especially when there’s no all-encompassing list of celebrations that are brought to life through extreme personalization.
That’s why I’ve put together this list: to simplify things and offer a clear breakdown of the core types of elopements to get you thinking about what feels true to you. The most popular types of elopements include:
Pro Tip: These categories serve as a well of inspiration, often encouraging couples to weave together elements from multiple elopement styles into one cohesive celebration that reflects their unique vision.
Are Weddings and Elopements Different?
Yes – and no. It’s important to remember that elopements are weddings. They hold just as much meaning, commitment, and celebration, but they simply break away from the traditional script. What sets them apart usually comes down to scale: a smaller guest count (or none at all), a more flexible timeline, and a focus that’s often more personal, intentional, and experience-driven rather than production-driven.
One isn’t better than the other – but one might be better for you. It all depends on what you value most when you imagine your wedding day: the energy of a larger gathering, or the intimacy of something slower, quieter, and more cemented in the moment.
If you need help determining if an elopement is for you, skip forward to Deciding if Eloping is For You.
Common Myths About Eloping
The world of elopements possesses a “lawless” quality – not because it is chaotic or meaningless, but because there are no rigid rules or regulations a couple must adhere to in order to elope. The elopement space boasts vast fronts of freedom, which means there are endless possibilities to explore. However, this kind of freedom leaves room for a lot of misconceptions about what qualifies as an important part of the elopement experience, and what doesn’t. Below, I’m breaking down three of the most common myths I hear couples wrestling with – and why it’s time to leave these misguided beliefs behind.
Myth #1: You Can’t Invite Guests to Your Elopement
This is false – you absolutely can! While two-person elopements are exceedingly popular, there are no rules that say you have to elope without family or friends by your side. My elopement experiences are customized to accommodate groups of two to twenty, honoring the intimate spirit of your celebration without it ever feeling like you’re hosting a party for others. This day is about you – and it should feel that way throughout every step of the process. You can learn more about my Elopement Packages here.
Unlike traditionally structured weddings, elopements offer countless ways to weave your loved ones into the experience – even if they aren’t physically present. You can honor their unwavering support while still protecting the one-on-one time that makes your celebration deeply personal, (you CAN have the best of both worlds). Check out this post to see How to Tell Loved Ones You’re Eloping & How to Include Them.
Myth #2: Elopements are Just “Cheaper”, Less Meaningful Weddings
While some couples may save money by eloping, it’s rarely just a budget decision. Many people who opt to elope can’t justify spending $50,000 or more on a traditional wedding that doesn’t align with who they are – but they can justify spending $10,000, (or more), into a celebration that is truly synced with how they want to honor their commitment.
Elopement budgets are often reallocated toward things that matter most – travel, photography, unforgettable experiences, and a curated selection of luxury vendors. It’s less about cutting costs, and more about choosing value. Tradition doesn’t automatically equal value. Value is a deeply personal thing – and just like value, elopements are the ultimate expression of a celebration built entirely around what matters most to you.
Myth #3: You Can Only Elope at the Courthouse
Although courthouse ceremonies are one form of an elopement, they are far from the only option. Elopements can happen virtually anywhere you can legally, (and safely), get married. If you’re dreaming of a destination with strict residency requirements or complicated legalities, many couples choose to officially marry at a courthouse back home, so they can celebrate freely in the location that truly speaks to them. From national parks, to public lands, to Bureau of Land Management (BLM) properties, to extravagant cities near or far, there’s no shortage of breathtaking places to say your vows and create a day that feels completely your own.
Check out these location resources on the blog:
Deciding if eloping is for you
If you’re wondering whether eloping is the right choice, ask yourself:
Do you value intimacy, intention, and experience over tradition?
Would you rather spend your wedding day adventuring together than making small talk with 100+ guests?
Do the logistics of a big wedding feel overwhelming or misaligned?
Do you want full creative freedom in designing a day that reflects your relationship?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, eloping might be the path that honors your values best. Just because you crave the freedom of something that feels deeply personal and intimate doesn’t mean you’re running away or missing out. You’re actively deciding, on your own terms, how you want to enter this next season of life together. And if you’re feeling torn between eloping and a more traditional celebration, that’s okay too. There is no one-size-fits-all format – many couples find creative and inspiring ways to blend the two, like eloping privately and celebrating with loved ones later. The way you get married is important. Your wedding celebration should not be what’s expected of you, rather it should be what you truly want. Listen to your gut – your story deserves to be told your way.
How to Begin Planning an Elopement
My Unique Storyboarding Approach
If you’re thinking about eloping, the infinite nature of ways to celebrate can sometimes feel like being dropped into the middle of the ocean – surrounded by possibility, unsure which direction to swim, and surfacing countless ideas as you try to find your way forward. But, it doesn’t have to be like this. I’ve created a one-of-a-kind storyboarding approach that’s designed to help you uncover the core of your desires, making it easy to find the path to a celebration that suits you best. You get the most out of your combined photography and elopement planning experience with this process because it feels like a natural continuation of your story.
Before you get caught up in navigating the logistics, dream it out. Storyboarding your elopement helps you visualize how you want the day or the experience to feel. Using prompts, color palettes, and mood boards, we can begin to map out everything from the emotional tone to the landscapes, timelines, and everything else in between.
Choosing a Date & Location
Picking a date and choosing a location often go hand-in-hand with each other during the elopement planning process. A great place to start is by thinking about the types of landscapes you resonate the most with, like rugged mountain peaks, glassy lakes, cloud inversions, mossy forests, windswept coastlines, black sand beaches, dense patches of woodland, the twinkling of city lights, etc. As you narrow in on a setting, you can start considering practical elements including but not limited to; typical weather patterns for the area, accessibility, obtaining any necessary permit or following specific regulations, and most importantly – the connection you and your partner feel to the places you’re considering. The location you choose will become a major staple of your experience.
Once you have a few locations in mind, you can start thinking more intentionally, (and maybe even a bit more strategically), about the time of year you want to elope. The season and the weather can dramatically shape your experience as well, as can factors like peak tourist crowds or heavy travel seasons. Some couples choose to anchor their elopement to a significant date, like an anniversary, while others prioritize their photographer’s availability. No matter what your values are, your location and date should work together to set the tone for a celebration that feels seamless and true-to-you.
Pro Tip: As a skilled elopement photographer, I can assist you with all of these tasks and more! This is a collaborative process, which means you never have to complete all of these things on your own – my expertise and guidance will help you find success throughout every part of your elopement journey.
Creating a Ceremony
Building an elopement ceremony comes down to deciding on two key things, the first of which being the type of ceremony you want to have. Ceremonies can be secular, religious, interfaith, or centered around a commitment without legal formalities, (also known as a “commitment ceremony”). You’ll then choose the symbolic elements or practices you’d like to include, such as hand-fasting, exchanging vows and/or rings, reading sentimental passages, etc. Your ceremony is a blank canvas, one where you can blend traditions, reinvent or borrow them, or create something that’s entirely original.
Depending on the type of ceremony you’re imagining, you may choose to work with an officiant or opt for a self-solemnized ceremony where you marry yourselves. (If you’re curious about self-solemnization, I have a full blog post you can check out here!) If you’re celebrating in the outdoors, keep in mind that some rituals – like open flames, tossing petals, or using confetti – might be restricted based on your location’s guidelines. A part of my job is helping you find beautiful alternatives that still elevate your ceremony, while respecting the landscapes we all use, enjoy, and love.
Pro Tip: I’m also ordained through the Universal Life Church, giving you even more flexibility to create the experience that feels right for you.
Incorporating Activities Into Your Elopement
Elopements already provide the ability to craft a day that isn’t rushed, strictly scheduled, or weighed down by a list of obligations. Instead, you have the opportunity to design once-in-a-lifetime experiences with activities that amplify the authenticity of your celebration. This is, perhaps, where the appeal of elopements shines the brightest.
While activities are by no means required to elope, or to have an out-of-the-box elopement experience, they are worthy of serious consideration. Thoughtfully chosen experiences can turn your wedding day into one of the most unforgettable adventures of your life.
Here are some ideas to start brainstorming:
Land Adventures
water Adventures
SKy Adventures
Tips For Planning Your Elopement
By now you have the foundational structure you need to not only visualize your elopement experience, but you also have a place to start in the planning process. Here are a few more tips to help you enjoy your elopement, while infusing it with meaning, spontaneity, and depth as you piece together your vision:
1.) Put together a playlist you can listen to throughout your day. Whether you create one master playlist or multiple, this is a great way to connect with your partner during the entire experience. Music can help guide you through waves of emotion, the transitional phases of the day, and keep the atmosphere elevated.
2.) If possible, don’t wait to book your travel and accommodations at the last minute. Lots of elopement destinations – especially national parks, remote lodges, or scenic towns – tend to have limited lodging options that book up months in advance, (particularly during peak travel seasons). Additionally, securing your flights, stays, and rentals early gives you access to better rates and availability. Don’t let the pressure of last-minute logistics shroud the excitement of planning the more creative and meaningful parts of your elopement.
3.) Instead of enforcing a tight schedule, build your elopement around the natural rhythms of the surrounding environment – think golden hour light, changing tides, seasonal blooms, etc. Let the landscape mold your timeline to ensure better conditions for photos, and an added sense of flexibility that feels grounded. For example, a mountain-top ceremony might mean starting your day before sunrise to hike in the dark in order to say your vows during the alpenglow. Another example would be a coastal elopement that revolves around low tide for beach access, or sunset for the most cinematic skies.
Elopement Planning Checklist
Regardless of where in the world you’re eloping, (or how), here’s a comprehensive checklist to help you organize your thoughts while seamlessly planning the elopement experience you deserve. Use this list as a guide, not a specific formula. Your elopement day is a reflection of your priorities, not anyone else’s.By now you have the foundational structure you need to not only visualize your elopement experience, but you also have a place to start in the planning process.
DREAM & DECIDE
BUILD YOUR VISION
ASSEMBLE YOUR DREAM TEAM
PLAN THE LOGISTICS
PERSONALIZE THE DETAILS
PACK WITH PURPOSE
PREPARE (EMOTIONALLY & PRACTICALLY)
CELEBRATE
additional Elopement FAQs
Can we still have traditions like a first look, vows, or a first dance?
Of course you can! Eloping doesn’t mean letting go of, or renouncing, all traditions. Eloping simply means choosing the ones that matter most to you. You can still exchange handwritten vows, do a first look, set aside time for a first dance, (even if it’s under the stars or with a speaker in a meadow somewhere), or share a celebratory toast. In fact, many couples find these moments even more emotional and special when experienced without the attendance of a large crowd.
Can we elope and still have a celebration or reception later?
Yes, this is a popular alternative for a lot of eloping couples too. Many couples elope for the intimacy, seclusion, and intentionality, then throw a celebration with loved ones later. Some opt for a backyard dinner party, a destination weekend with friends and family, or even a more traditional reception months down the road. Remember, there are no rules here – just everything you want, and nothing that you don’t!
Do we have to hike or do something “adventurous” to elope?
No, not at all. Adventure means different things to different people. For some, it’s hiking to an alpine lake at sunrise. For other’s, it’s staying in a cozy cabin off of the beaten path, lounging by the ocean, or venturing out to a historic city with no itinerary. Eloping is about intention, not adrenaline. Whether your perfect day involves muddy hiking boots or barefoot beach vows, it’s all valid.
How far in advance should we start planning our elopement?
This depends on your vision and flexibility. Some couples easily plan their elopement in just a few weeks, which is primarily the case for local or laid-back elopements. Other’s book out a year to eighteen months, typically for dream destinations, high-travel seasons, or elopements that involve guests or multi-day experiences. I recommend starting at least 6-8 months in advance if you’re traveling, or have your heart set on working with specific vendors. The sooner you start, the more time you’ll have to truly personalize your elopement without feeling rushed.
What does your role as a photographer include — do you help with planning too?
Yes – I’m far more than just your elopement photographer! I help you co-create an elopement experience that reflects who you are, and your story. From the beginning, I help you map out your ideas and connect the dots to design your perfect celebration. From location ideas, collaborative timeline customization, vendor recommendations permit navigation, and thoughtful personalization suggestions, I’m with you every step of the way. My work is both visual and logistical – part artist, part guide, part calm-in-the-chaos. I don’t just show up to take photos, I help make sure your day feels like you from beginning to end.
You can find more info about my elopement packages and pricing here.
Eloping is Powerful
The act of eloping is empowering because it signifies how you and your partner choose to redefine what commitment and celebration means for your relationship. Above all else, eloping is about choice. There’s an unparalleled liberation, a vast sense of freedom, in carving your own path to the celebration you truly want. It’s choosing presence over performance, intimacy over a rigid itinerary – an elopement day that feels like the two of you, in every detail and facet.
This is your reminder: your love is enough. Your way is the right way. And more than anything, your elopement can be anything you dream it to be. Looking for more planning tools, guides, or elopement inspiration? Explore the blog, browse real elopement stories, or reach out for a one-on-one free elopement consultation. I’d love to help you bring your elopement vision to life – whatever that might be!
